Archive for Conflict Resolution

Kindness Matters

Posted on Conflict Resolution, General, Parenting October 19, 2017 by Mary George

Kindness Matters

National Bullying Prevention Month

In our My Remarkable Self program, we work with children and adults to understand what bullying and cyberbullying is and how to prevent it through interactive  lessons and workshops.In observation of National Bullying Prevention Month we thought that we would share a few ideas and resources to help you be a part of the movement to stop bullying.

 
A few signs that your child is being bullied:
 – Unexplainable injuries
 – Sudden loss of friends or avoidance of social situations;  spending more time alone, either at home or in their room

– Unexpectedly stops using devices

A few signs that you child is a bully:
– Is increasingly aggressive
– Blames others for their problems; Does not accept responsibility for their actions
– Quickly switches screens or hides device when you are close by
Conversation starters:
“What was the best part of your school day? Any bad things?”
“How was lunch today? Who did you sit with? What did you talk about?”
“Other than your [Mom, Dad, parental figure], who do you trust to go to with a problem?”
 
Encourage your children to be inclusive of others by:
– Sitting with someone they do not usually do at lunch (check out the FANTASTIC
“Sit with Us” App designed by a student!)
 -Making friends with someone at school who they don’t know. Many children wish that someone had done that for them at some point.
-Encourage your child to be an UPSTANDER – Bullies have been known to back off when others stand up for victims.
 
Encourage your school to get involved:
StompOutBullying.org has wonderful ideas for teachers and schools as to how to develop empathy, encourage being an upstander, and yearlong activities to get children involved in to bring greater awareness to bullying and cyberbullying.
 
Books to read with your children:
by Trudy Ludwig:
My Secret Bully 
Just Kidding
The Invisible Boy 
Sorry!
Stand Tall, Molly Lou Melon by Patty Lovell
The Juice Box Bully by Bob Sornson and Maria Dismondy
Stand up for Yourself & Your Friends – American Girl
Wonder by R. J. Palacio
Real Friends by Shannon Hale and LeUuen Pham

 

—Mary & Claire

 

**My Remarkable Self is available to give workshops, school/camp assemblies and classes for parents, students, educators and businesses. Please contact us at info@myremarkableself.com for further information.**

 

© Kids Empowered LLC and My Remarkable Self® 2017

Bullying vs Teasing – Do YOU know the difference?

Posted on Communication, Conflict Resolution, General October 26, 2015 by Mary George

October is Bullying Prevention Awareness Month and school children all over the country are being talked to about this incredibly important topic. As I spoke with my children about their understanding and take aways of what bullying and cyberbullying is, I saw that they were gaining an understanding of it but were unable to distinguish the difference between teasing and true bullying as I am sure most of adults cannot either. If I said to you right now, “Give me a definition and example of basic day to day bullying,” could you do it? It is a very important distinction to understand these days as the word bully is thrown around in far too many situations where it is not appropriate and with serious consequences. 
 

So what is bullying? The definition given by StopBullying.gov states:

 – An Imbalance of Power: Kids who bully use their power—such as physical strength, access to embarrassing information, or popularity—to control or harm others. Power imbalances can change over time and in different situations, even if they involve the same people.

 – Repetition: Bullying behaviors happen more than once or have the potential to happen more than once.

 – Bullying includes actions such as making threats, spreading rumors, attacking someone physically or verbally, and excluding someone from a group on purpose. 

The types of Bullying that occur:

 – VERBAL -use of words, statements and name calling to belittle, demean and hurt another person.  Gaining power and control over target.

 –  SOCIAL/RELATIONAL -sneaky and insidious types of bullying that often goes unnoticed by parents and educators  – sometimes referred to as emotional bullying.  Often within social groups and predominantly amongst girls between 5-8th grades.

 
 – PHYSICAL -Physical entails hitting, kicking, punching, spitting or tripping another child.

The difference between bullying and teasing gets very mixed because teasing, while many times is not meant to hurt another person, it can. Teasing is generally “to make fun of somebody.” This happens at school, between an adult and a child and between siblings. Teasing is meant to be a game in which harm is not intended unlike bullying where harm is intended to a weaker person. Teasing can come across as funny or playful by the person teasing but can be taken as hurtful by the person experiencing it. Teasing can be overcome by a person having a strong sense of self. Having a good relationship with your child in which you are able to talk about problems that they are having helps to develop their resilience and their understanding of how to handle situations.

As you are talking to your child about what they are learning about bullying this month, help them to understand that it is never okay for someone else to make them feel bad. Remind them of the amazing talents, abilities and positive attributes they each have which makes them special. Help guide them as to what to do when they feel they are teased or bullied. Empower your child.

 

—Mary & Claire

 

**My Remarkable Self is available to give workshops, school/camp assemblies and classes for parents, students, educators and businesses. Please contact us for further information.**

 

© Kids Empowered LLC and My Remarkable Self® 2015